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5 Heartbreaking Truths Behind NF's "How Could You Leave Us" And His New 2025 Music

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The phrase "How Could You Leave Us" is not just a sentence; it is a raw, agonizing question that became the centerpiece of one of modern rap’s most powerful and emotionally devastating tracks. As of late 2025, the song remains a pivotal moment in the career of rapper NF, serving as a visceral, uncensored letter to his late mother about her struggle with opiate addiction and the profound pain her absence caused him and his siblings. The track is a cornerstone of his musical identity, establishing him as an artist unafraid to confront the darkest corners of his mental health and family trauma.

This enduring song, first released in 2016, continues to resonate with millions of listeners globally, particularly as NF (Nathan Feuerstein) progresses in his career, recently releasing the highly successful *Fear* EP in 2025. The themes of pain, abandonment, and the search for control, first laid bare in "How Could You Leave Us," are still the driving force behind his new music, proving that the scars of the past are central to his artistic present.

NF: The Rapper Who Turned Trauma into Chart-Topping Art (Biography & Profile)

Nathan John Feuerstein, known professionally as NF (stylized as ИF), has carved out a unique space in the music industry by fusing the lyrical complexity of rap with the raw, confessional honesty of a therapy session. His career is defined by vulnerability, tackling subjects like anxiety, depression, loss, and the Christian faith with an intensity that has earned him a massive, dedicated following. Here is a brief profile of the artist behind the legendary track "How Could You Leave Us."

  • Full Name: Nathan John Feuerstein
  • Stage Name: NF (often stylized as ИF)
  • Born: March 30, 1991
  • Birthplace: Gladwin, Michigan, USA
  • Genre: Hip Hop, Christian Hip Hop, Alternative Hip Hop
  • Defining Albums: Therapy Session (2016), Perception (2017), The Search (2019), Hope (2023)
  • Key Themes: Mental health struggles, anxiety, depression, childhood trauma, faith, and the pressure of fame.
  • Career Highlight: His 2017 album, Perception, unexpectedly debuted at No. 1 on the US Billboard 200 chart.
  • Latest Project: The six-song *Fear* EP, released in 2025, which made the biggest Christian album debut of 2025.

1. The Raw, Uncensored Story of Loss and Opiate Addiction

"How Could You Leave Us" is a track from NF's 2016 album *Therapy Session*. The song is a direct, emotional confrontation with his mother, who passed away in 2011 from an overdose of prescription pills after a long battle with opiate addiction.

The lyrics are not a celebration of her life, but a painful, unfiltered expression of the confusion, anger, and feelings of abandonment that NF and his siblings experienced throughout their childhood.

A Letter Written in Pain

The song is structured like a letter, with NF posing questions that many children of addicts face. He addresses the neglect and the constant uncertainty, asking how his mother could choose her addiction over her own children.

NF describes a childhood where he was often left waiting for a mother who never showed up because she was "too busy" with her addiction. This feeling of being forgotten and unimportant is a central theme that drives the song's emotional weight.

The Sound of Despair

What makes the track so iconic is its ending. The song famously concludes with NF audibly breaking down, sobbing and crying into the microphone, a moment that encapsulates the sheer, unadulterated pain of his experience. This decision to include the raw audio of his grief cemented the song's reputation as one of the most honest and tear-jerking tracks in modern hip-hop.

The song became an anthem for others dealing with similar family tragedies, serving as an important voice against the destructive power of the opiate crisis in America.

2. The Enduring Thematic Link to NF's Latest 2025 Music

While "How Could You Leave Us" was released years ago, its emotional blueprint is visible across NF's entire discography, right up to his most recent projects. His music often explores the concept of "The Search" for peace and the struggle against internal demons, which are direct consequences of his childhood trauma.

The Connection to the *Fear* EP (2025)

In 2025, NF released his highly anticipated six-song EP, *Fear*, which made a significant impact on the charts. The EP’s title and tracks like "FEAR," "HOME," and "WHO I WAS" continue the narrative of internal conflict and the attempt to reconcile with his past self. The emotional intensity and lyrical focus on mental health in the *Fear* EP show that the issues first explored in "How Could You Leave Us"—abandonment, anxiety, and the struggle for control—are still his primary artistic focus.

Topical Authority: The Opiate Crisis and Public Awareness

The track gave NF a platform to speak on a sensitive topic that was, for a long time, largely ignored in mainstream media: the opioid epidemic and its impact on children. His willingness to be vulnerable transformed his personal tragedy into a piece of public advocacy, with fans often sharing how the song helped them process their own experiences with addiction in their families.

3. The Lyrical Entities and Emotional Pillars of the Song

The depth of "How Could You Leave Us" is built on specific lyrical entities and concepts that ground the song in NF's reality and enhance its topical authority. Understanding these elements is key to appreciating the track's lasting impact.

  • The House: The physical setting of his childhood, which he describes as a place of neglect and pain, not comfort.
  • The Pills: A direct reference to the opiate addiction that consumed his mother's life and ultimately led to her death.
  • The Memories: NF expresses a deep hatred for the fragmented, painful memories he is left with, struggling to hold onto the good while being overwhelmed by the bad.
  • The Funeral: He describes the profound emotional numbness he felt at the funeral, a classic symptom of shock and trauma.
  • The Money: A poignant reflection on his success, where he notes that he now has the money to help her, a cruel irony given her passing.

The song is not merely a rap track; it is a profound piece of musical therapy. It gives voice to the voiceless, transforming NF's deepest wound into a source of hope and connection for others who have lost loved ones to the devastating cycle of addiction.

5 Heartbreaking Truths Behind NF's
how could you leave us
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