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29 Years And Counting: Inside The Enduring, Private Marriage Of Debra Winger And Arliss Howard

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Few Hollywood romances manage to survive the intense glare of the spotlight for decades, but the marriage of Oscar-nominated actress Debra Winger and versatile actor/director Arliss Howard stands as a quiet testament to enduring partnership. As of this current date in December 2025, the couple is approaching their 29th wedding anniversary, having cultivated a famously private life that prioritizes family and creative work over celebrity fanfare.

Their story is not one of tabloid drama, but of two powerhouse artists who found a deep connection later in life, choosing a path that led them away from the relentless Hollywood machine. Their bond, forged on a movie set in the early 1990s, continues to thrive, providing a rare example of stability in the often-turbulent world of entertainment.

Complete Biography and Professional Profiles: Debra Winger and Arliss Howard

Before their paths crossed, both Debra Winger and Arliss Howard had already established significant, critically acclaimed careers in film and television. Their individual biographies reveal a shared history of commitment to complex, challenging roles.

Debra Winger: The Oscar-Nominated Icon

  • Full Name: Mary Debra Winger
  • Born: May 16, 1955 (Age 70 in 2025)
  • Birthplace: Cleveland Heights, Ohio, U.S.
  • Spouse: Arliss Howard (m. 1996–present)
  • Previous Spouse: Timothy Hutton (m. 1986; div. 1990)
  • Children: Noah Hutton (from first marriage), Gideon "Babe" Ruth Howard (with Arliss Howard)
  • Notable Filmography Entities:
    • An Officer and a Gentleman (1982)
    • Terms of Endearment (1983)
    • Shadowlands (1993)
    • Urban Cowboy (1980)
    • The Sheltering Sky (1990)
  • Key Achievements: Three-time Academy Award nominee for Best Actress (for An Officer and a Gentleman, Terms of Endearment, and Shadowlands).

Arliss Howard: The Versatile Character Actor and Director

  • Full Name: Leslie Richard "Arliss" Howard
  • Born: October 18, 1954 (Age 71 in 2025)
  • Birthplace: Independence, Missouri, U.S.
  • Spouse: Debra Winger (m. 1996–present)
  • Previous Spouse: Karen Mary Sellars (divorced)
  • Children: Sam Howard (from first marriage), Gideon "Babe" Ruth Howard (with Debra Winger)
  • Notable Filmography Entities:
    • Full Metal Jacket (1987)
    • Moneyball (2011)
    • Mank (2020)
    • The Killer (2023)
    • The Day After (TV Movie, 1983)
    • Rubicon (TV Series, 2010)
  • Key Achievements: Also a respected screenwriter and film director, directing films like Big Bad Love (2001).

The Spark: How a Film Set Led to a Lifelong Partnership

The story of how Debra Winger and Arliss Howard met is rooted in the collaborative, intense atmosphere of a film production. The two actors first crossed paths in 1991 on the set of the quirky, romantic fantasy film, Wilder Napalm.

The movie, which was released in 1993, featured Winger and Howard as a married couple with pyrokinetic abilities—a far cry from a typical meet-cute. Despite the unusual premise of the film, the professional collaboration quickly blossomed into a personal relationship.

At the time, both were coming out of previous marriages. Winger had divorced actor Timothy Hutton in 1990, with whom she shares a son, Noah Hutton. Howard had also separated from his first wife, Karen Mary Sellars, and had a son, Sam Howard.

Their shared experience as seasoned actors and parents likely provided a strong foundation for their burgeoning connection. They dated for several years before deciding to formalize their commitment. They married in a private ceremony in December 1996, marking the beginning of their nearly three-decade journey together.

Family Life and the Choice to Leave the Hollywood System

A year after their marriage, the couple welcomed their son, Gideon Babe Ruth Howard, known affectionately as "Babe" Howard, in 1997.

Their blended family, consisting of Noah Hutton, Sam Howard, and Babe Howard, became the centerpiece of their lives. This commitment to family was a driving force behind Winger's controversial decision to step away from the major Hollywood spotlight for a period in the late 1990s and early 2000s.

Winger, a three-time Oscar nominee, famously chose to leave the pressures of the industry to focus on her personal life and family. This move was a joint decision with Howard, who equally valued a life away from the Los Angeles-centric film world.

They settled in a riverfront home in Westchester County, New York, establishing a quiet, East Coast base that allowed them to pursue their creative endeavors without the constant scrutiny of the paparazzi.

A Partnership in Art and Life

Unlike many celebrity couples, Winger and Howard have maintained a low public profile, only occasionally appearing together at events. Their relationship is characterized by mutual support for their artistic freedom.

They have continued to collaborate professionally, both acting in and directing projects. Howard directed Winger in the film *Big Bad Love* (2001), a project that further showcased their shared artistic vision.

In recent years, Winger has spoken openly about the secret to their long-lasting marriage, emphasizing the importance of keeping things "interesting" and maintaining a sense of humor.

Despite their desire for privacy, they occasionally make public appearances, often to support their children's work or a new project. In 2024, they were seen together attending the opening celebration of 'The New' in New York City, a testament to their continued presence as a stable, loving unit in the arts community.

Their ability to balance high-level acting careers with a fiercely protected private life has made their marriage a unique and inspiring success story. By stepping back from the relentless pursuit of fame, Debra Winger and Arliss Howard have successfully navigated nearly three decades of partnership, proving that sometimes, the quiet life is the one that lasts the longest.

debra winger and arliss howard
debra winger and arliss howard

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